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Thread: Eight Syllables per Second

  1. #1
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    Default Eight Syllables per Second

    Hi guys, this is my first real attempt at a bit of wordplay, first time I've ever shared any lyrics with anyone. I usually just write by myself for kicks haha. If you try and rap this it is hard because there is pretty much a syllable for every beat. Try rapping this coherently at 140bpm!

    I will reign over you like a divisionary military
    I will pain over you like a misery symphony
    I paint like Dali visionary imagery
    Will I gain to the roof? the mystery killing me
    I'm genuine and I flow it fast like I'm on amphetamines
    I'm heroin every second you hear within you're cherishing
    I'm menacing I'm here again ready to release the bear within
    I'm leathering the beat until it's numb like it's on ketamine
    I'm settling forever then I write threatening lettering
    I'm relishing the chance to take you bitches back to hell again
    I'm bellowing my lyrics boiling over like I'm kettling
    I'm gesturing to you my middle fingers in the air again
    I'm arrogant dominating these bitches like I'm stabbing them
    I'm having them the depth of my thoughts you cannot fathom them
    I'm slapping them faces red like butt cheeks when I am smacking and
    whacking them flow brittle like chicken necks when I am snapping them
    fatten then flatten them til they're denser than platinum
    splattering their blood everywhere because I'm a champion
    I'm all around this planet like rain I'm pitter pattering
    I'm battering you all blow up like I'm burning potassium
    I'm lavishing my words it's like they've all got saffron in
    I'm branding you with a curse you will be forever harrowing
    and I am better live cos records I am smashing them
    I'm mastering the art to beat you all I am the bastion
    I'm brandishing my weapon lock stock to smoking barrels and
    I'm hammering words to the stone because most places banning them
    That's flattering you can't keep up with flows when I am rapping to
    The maximum you fall apart like codes when I am cracking them
    I'm bantering artilleries I am manning them
    I'm cannoning you all until I guess it doesn't matter then
    Just cantering and you think I run faster than a famished thin
    Cheetah sprint when it sees an antelope in the distance

  2. #2
    Member Rap Dog Level VII Note's Avatar
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    Default Re: Eight Syllables per Second

    i'd have to memorise it before i could rap it fluidly
    but i threw a random beat on and did okay
    nice stuff btw, if you're a new head please keep posting


  3. #3
    Super Moderator ModeratorRap Dog Level IX BeatBoxx*Eternal's Avatar
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    Default Re: Eight Syllables per Second

    Absolutely stick around man... this is some of the best stuff I've read in a while and it's a fresh style...

    A little mainstream in concepts but it's a nice complexity, and a cool scheme. Some tongue twista shit.

    Keep up and at it,

    *Beatz
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  4. #4
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    Default Re: Eight Syllables per Second

    Good Shit!

  5. #5
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    Default Re: Eight Syllables per Second

    Thanks for the positive feedback guys, I've never shown anyone this stuff before so really means a lot ^_^! The concepts definitely suffered slightly so I could stick to the rhyming pattern where possible, I was just kinda writing what came into my head as I wrote and fitting it into the pattern rather than trying to be really coherent on topic.

  6. #6
    Member Rap Dog Level IX Brinks's Avatar
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    Default Re: Eight Syllables per Second

    Same as BBE man, if you focusing on how it sounds too why not get a mic and start recording, good verse just needs to be a little more creative
    Hip hop is your world man, here you can defy gravity and break laws of physics all because you put it in words

  7. #7
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    Default Re: Eight Syllables per Second

    Flows off, multies off.. Dunno what they all on ^^^

    Try not making rhymes with -ing endings.. rookies rely on those

    Keep up
    Last edited by chim:instinx; 07-09-2011 at 09:58 PM.

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  8. #8
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    Default Re: Eight Syllables per Second

    Chim getting his troll on. Don't worry dude, real rap heads can see what you were trying to do here. I'll just let you know, since you're new here, that Chim and mcsquires are the resident jokes. Squires is the funnier joke, tho. Chim's only a joke because he's so wack, but takes himself seriously.


  9. #9
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    Default Re: Eight Syllables per Second

    Haha yeah figured it might be a troll because if this piece has one thing then it's multis, cheers

    I haven't got a mic except the shitty one on the laptop, I might look into getting one now, idk anything about the cost and the quality trade-off though

    I'm writing something with a lot more creativity right now, something that isn't just 'flex', hoping it turns out well

    cheers for the feedback again guys!

  10. #10
    Member Rap Dog Level IX Brinks's Avatar
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    Default Re: Eight Syllables per Second

    Check out the audio thread here, no doubt there is a couple about cheap usb mics for computers, if your looking for flow definitely get some audio in bro
    Hip hop is your world man, here you can defy gravity and break laws of physics all because you put it in words

  11. #11
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    Default Re: Eight Syllables per Second

    Quote Originally Posted by SpitFiYa View Post
    Haha yeah figured it might be a troll because if this piece has one thing then it's multis, cheers!

    Lol yall dunno what multies are

    Divisionary military? Misery symphony?

    The fuck? Thats a multie to u? Yea um try again u 2

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  12. #12
    Member Rap Dog Level IX Brinks's Avatar
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    Default Re: Eight Syllables per Second

    Um he's new...so we work on the basic's...as a mod you should know that and that would be a basic multie
    Hip hop is your world man, here you can defy gravity and break laws of physics all because you put it in words

  13. #13
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    Default Re: Eight Syllables per Second

    ?????? The shit dont even rhyme.. N im talkin to note on this..

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